a patch of pumpkins

It was a gorgeous pumpkin patch day, with the mountains right next to us, but I couldn't get a picture cause the sun was setting right behind them.

1.
My lopsided beauty.

2.
The bountiful spread.

3.
Jeremy claimed his method of determination involved standing on them to see if they could hold his weight..

4.
JP, loading up the wagon.

5.
Trusty stead?

6.
We only had room for three.

7.
Menfolk.

8.
All carved up.

..but what could it be?

So I wanted my Halloween costume to be a surprise this year, but Nora has ants in her pants and so I promised her I would post some in-progress photos so she could guess what the finished product will be. Here goes:

*
In my bathtub dying my costume purple.

**
Stirring for thirty to sixty minutes turned the tips of my fingers purple.

***
Sad, sad, sad face because the container had a few holes and not only my costume and fingers turned purple, but also the porcelain..shhh.

****
First step complete. Any guesses?

fake bacon and a red mohawk

Pigeon's first birthday was last week, celebrating in style with a sign up in the window, fresh baked brownies for me and her first taste of hummus. I'd given her a bath the day before to effectively clean her birthday suit which she wasn't happy about, but the mealworm treats helped ease the transition. Realizing that she may very well be a third of the way through her life helped push me forward towards finally finding a vet.

I made an appointment and packed her cozy style in a shoe box that had formerly been housing the contents of my old junk drawer. She was understandably crabby as she had gone to bed only a few hours prior and was being rudely jostled into the bright light of the day. We made it there, jar of coffee in one hand, shoe box in the other, and met the very welcoming kind vet. Pigeon apparently doesn't like vets, or this vet, or life in general at 10:00am and made that quite clear. She balled herself up like a champion, shaking and growling and popping with gall. I've never seen her so worked up! The assistant was holding her with these ridiculous leather gloves, the smell of which were probably freaking her out even more, on a metal table under bright lights. In any case, in an effort to help her relax and be more comfortable with the situation, the vet offered her a fake bacon treat. Pigeon, the little fatty, uncurled and munched it right down. She did however pause to anoint herself with it and the resulting red mohawk was all that we have to show for the entire visit..

to the top!

I finally made it to Estes, on a gorgeous sunny day no less! We left Denver after yoga where it was 80 degrees and sunshine-y and pleasantly breezy. Strapped on my back were sandwiches, tootsie roll pops and some box wine for good measure. We blew through Boulder and stopped for a coffee in Estes, sneaking into the Mcdonald's to swipe some mayonnaise (take that establishment!). We took the requisite sign photo after snapping dozens for tourists in matching t-shirts:






We rode into Rocky Mountain National Park and tooled up the mountain taking in amazing views, trees starting to change their colors for fall, snow tipped peaks and even some Elk! I tried to take a picture from the motorcycle, but it maybe wasn't the brightest idea and I settled for shots while stationary.






At the top is was cold but gorgeous! JP made a few snowballs while I steered clear of the cold as best I could. Minnesota winter is just not a distant enough memory for me to be able to relish the idea of more snow just yet..














We had a picnic at the top which was delicious and not just because the altitude made a sip of wine feel like a bottle..




...and our trusty stead. Mmmm it was a great, great afternoon. The ride down was hurried partially because I was wearing girl shoes without socks and partially because we had dinner plans at my cousin's house that we were late for while still on the mountain.. we honked people out of our way when they paused to take in the magnificent elk that came right up to the road, choosing instead to view them at full speed with a nod of acknowledgment from my backseat perch.

rough around the edges, or how I settle in..

Here we have my closet; with ample storage, a lack of clothes (I don't know why I didn't think they wore clothes in Denver), and just enough red galoshes for all this rain we've been having!

My last bathroom was stripes so it had to be polka dots this time around..

First things first, Grandma's painting found a home, and of course my helmet came with me!

Here's my little kitchen, Pigeon's room with a view.

My tiny cot, banished to the corner. It is exactly as small as it looks.

In sum, after two days in the ol' homestead I am content to be living alone for the first time ever. I had First Apartment Coffee this morning and watched the rain from my window while I caught up with friends. Things are unpacked for the most part and even though it's a small place it's quite bare! My sights are set on a futon, a bookshelf, and some tables to round it out a bit. Rest assured that by the time I've got my first out of town visitors there will be places to sit! I'm sure the cot will suffice as a perfect guest bed, so don't worry about lodging..

a resting place, for now

I've been searching for an apartment all week, I know it's pathetic I haven't already secured a job, a home and a gaggle of friends after three days on the trail, but the pieces are at least starting to come together! Maybe the pieces are just starting to be formed into recognizable pieces, but either way it's good so far.

I've seen some dirty carpet dumps, a kitchen that was literally a closet (a small closet) that was accessible only if you stood at the doorway and leaned in with some stretch-armstrong like arms, exposed brick walls, mini fridges, a closet that was partially taken up by the back of the fridge and one special one with the sink detached from the wall.. Gritting my teeth and plodding forward I've finally found a sweet little studio on Poet's Row in Capitol Hill. It's got arched doorways, hardwood floors and lots of sunlight. My application is pending, so cross your fingers I get accepted and can post some pictures! They are always taken aback when in response to the question "When do you want to move in?" I say "Well my car is full and right outside..! (grin grin, but seriously)".

In other life-moving-forward news I've gotten my first interview for a job! Very exciting as my rent will potentially be much steeper than the steals I've occupied in Seward these past few years.. It's a nanny position for a four month old, flexible twenty-hours a week and hopefully no fluffly dander-y cats to stand in my way of an income! Goodbye restaurants, hello snotty noses and stinky diapers! There's nothing quite like having a degree to open up new and exciting career paths...!

I have also (re)realized my love of motorcycles, the open road and mountain sunsets. All great things by themselves, but combined they make quite a lovely collection. This weekend takes me to Estes Park for a meandering mountain winding excursion, the perfect thing to relax after this demandingly hard work week.

a new leaf

maybe it was mostly because it was unexpected. the whole thing unexpected, and the end came sharp like an accidental slip of the knife that brings bright red pouring out before you even realize you hurt. it was like that twice, but more so the second time as though I should have seen it or felt it an instant before.

I’m not sure how to tangle it out just yet, but parts of me feel light and parts feel deep and painful, like I should hide them for a little while until the ouch is ready to be exposed to the glaring lights.

It’s good, the right thing and the right choice. I must be growing up, not taking the easy way out, and I’m not quite sure when that changed.

I want to do some things while the spotlight of my life is pointed only at me.

1. I want to love my plants, watch them grow and change. I want more plants, little green sprouting anomalies that are different each day.

2. I want to learn how to feel sadness straight on without the cover of distractions. I want to be able to breathe into it and realize that it is so much better to feel so strongly than to mute it and repress it.

3. I want to live in a new city, discover secret treasure maps that other people have created around their favorite places and try them on to see how they fit. I want new adventures that make me grow and change me into more of myself. I need to be out of my comfort zone so that my zone can stretch.

4. I want to spend time writing and reading and creating. I want to indulge myself, see what I have been thinking and feeling while I’ve been busy doing other things instead.

5. I want to spend more time surrounded by trees and water and grass. Bike rides and camping and late night walks that remind me of simple things and how happy they make me.

6. I want to celebrate my friends who are finding and living love. I want to experience their happiness alongside them and watch as they learn each other, while encouraging and supporting them.

I have lots of plans, except a plan for how to take the next step. I think it will come, and I’m not going to force it. I am going to just cry when I need to, sleep more and eat more. I’m going to make dinner with my friends and dance in my underwear just because it’s hot outside and it feels good to move. I’m going to sing at the top of my lungs every time I am in my car. I am going to drag my friends to karaoke and show them how much fun it can be. I’m going to swim in the lake, swing in the park and sit on rooftops.

I’m going to be single.