Thank You.

I don't adhere to the typical calender anymore apparently.  I just started listening to Christmas music last week, when I was writing a prescription and came to the realization that, holy shnikey, December is already half way over. Didn't we just celebrate Halloween?!  I certainly hope this is not a sign of getting older, because life is going by way to fast for my liking. I am already seeing some of my patients for 6 month follow up appointments. WHAT? Yes, 6 month follow up.  See what I mean about too fast? So, since I can't seem to get a handle on time, or timely posts, let's rewind a little again and let me give thanks before I wrap my brain around turning 30, and celebrating Christmas all in just a few days.

So, in this season that often flys by amid a tangle of shopping and to-do lists, I want to take a quick moment for reflection.

In no particular order, here are a few of the things in my life for which I am thankful.

- One of the many unexpected things to come out of a wedding celebration, is the overwhelming appreciation for all the love and support of your family and friends.  I think the stress of planning a huge (weekend long?!?) party can overshadow a lot of things until you are finally there in the moment, and can appreciate the magnitude of people flying in from all over the country simply to join in celebration of your commitment to a life long partner.  JP and I would catch each others eyes all weekend long, over the din of our favorite people gathering together in one place.  They were working in the kitchen, hanging lights in the rafters, gathering rocks and sand from the beach and creating table arrangements, entertaining the cousins, and so much more, all while forming new relationships with each other.  (Clearly I need to write a wedding post some day soon)  It really was a very humbling and incredible experience to feel so lifted up in love by such amazing people.  For them I am so grateful.

- And one of the expected things to come out of my wedding celebration? Well, a new husband of course.  I am thankful everyday for the unwavering love, support, and laughter that my handsome groom gives to me.  He is my rock, my best friend, and one of the best humans I have ever known.  How he manages to deal with allllllll my craziness, I may never know, but I am so thankful that he does.

- I am so thankful for my job.  Though it is very hard, and at times I still struggle with finding the words, or figuring out the pieces of a particular patient's puzzle, or even just trusting myself and my knowledge, I know that I learn and grow everyday.  My patients teach me so much, and I am constantly amazed at how much trust they have in me, sharing some of their most intimate life experiences with someone they barely know.  I hope I am giving them all that they need, cause I am certainly trying hard!

- CRAFTS.  Um, seriously I am thankful for crafts and crafting.  I love the thinking of, the making of, and the possibility of crafts, crafts, crafts.  I am thankful that I have the time in my life again for creating things with my hands, because that it a very life giving thing for me.

- Laughter.  I laugh constantly. Inappropriately, aptly, and loudly.  I think there is nothing I like better than laughing.  It just makes everything better.  I am blessed with hilarious friends, and a job that very easily lends itself to either laughter or tears, for which I most often choose laughter.  I am thankful for every single chortle, gufaw, giggle, pee in your pants, tears down your eyes laugh in my life.

I think that should probably suffice for now.  I hope to keep this gratitude in my minds eye every day.  And so, on wards to Christmas, eh? See you on the other side!

rewind: cliff island

Ok, with the temperatures hovering in and around freezing lately, and our heat officially turned on (but only to 60, with space heaters galore) I figured it might be nice to look back at a few summer adventures I had that I never wrote about because of the whole wedding vortex-y black hole.

So, CLIFF ISLAND! We were lucky enough to stay the weekend in a beautifully simple island home abutting the water that Joe's friends own.  An amazingly peaceful place that all but demands you forget the outside world and focus on the here and now.

We took the ferry en masse, with Osa charming everyone, and sometimes scaring the by poking her nose through the gates on the top deck.  It was windy but sunny, and on days like that it feels like you have to layer up and stay right in the middle of the fresh ocean breeze.

We packed a haul of groceries, and then left many of the crucial supplies back on the main land. But we made due, with risotto and fresh caught lobster from a neighbor down the road.

We biked and strolled on the beach, talking about my parent's island dream house in a secluded section surrounded by nature and on the edge of a cliff.  We skipped rocks, explored the beaches, and chased Osa down.  We even played tennis and took turns catching some internet on the porch of the island library.

Joe and I biked down to the dock late that first night to lay on our bellies and swish our arms in the water looking for bioluminescents and sipping on whiskey.

It was an amazing break from reality, which is always true for me when I visit new parts of Maine.  The islands especially give me a very content sense of myself.

I can see the draw towards island living.  It would slow your pace by simple necessity, and disconnect you from that sense of urgency I often feel when living in a city.  But for now, it is enough to take those moments in spurts, and look forward to the next.

it's been waiting for you

We had a splendid long weekend in NYC that of course flew by way too fast, and utterly wore us out in a good way.  We had quite a lot of fun, and we packed in as much as we could!

Our trip down we listened to Bossypants read by Tina Fey, and it was great.  Perfectly hilarious and entertaining.  I had been meaning to read the book but held off until I had time for Tina to read it to me, which made it all the better.

After battling the massive traffic pile we made it to Brooklyn and settled our things into Joe's friend's apartment which was much bigger than most places I've seen in the city, and suited us just fine.  We basically went straight to Caracas, my favorite place to eat in New York, and met up with Emily and her friend Sophia.  I don't even think we were that hungry when we got there, but that did not stop us from shoving an ungodly amount of food in our faces, and then finishing it off with dessert.  MMMmmmmm.  If you an opportunity to try an arepa first hand, you should jump at it because they are delicious.  We make them at home, but somehow we are missing some small thing cause they are never as delish as the ones you can get at Caracas.

On Saturday we slept in a bit, and whipped up some tasty breakfast before zipping out the door to catch the train.  I always find it disconcerting when you pop up from a subway station and are in a completely different place.  I think it's because my grasp of the neighborhoods and stations in NYC is basically non existent, which means I am constantly turned around and unsure of myself.  Plus, a lot of the streets look quite similar to the untrained out of town eyeball.  But, luckily we were with Joe who is a seasoned traveler and knows NY well so we were in good hands and free to people watch and follow blindly as much as we wanted.

We went to Central Park of course, and walked around the Highline before going to the Natural History Museum and gawking at the dinosaurs.

We met up with JP's friend Jordan from Louisiana in Chinatown and he took us to a little hole in the wall restaurant right by his apartment called Nam.  It was amazing.  Like ordered multiple round of food amazing.  They had some ribs that were outrageously tasty.  After we stuffed ourselves there we played some pool and rounded out the evening with a little karaoke of course.  My cousin Nick and his husband Greg even made it out after they got off work!  Haven't seen them in years!  It was a great time, although Emma and I sang I Wanna Dance With Somebody, and we both forgot that there is a pretty significant key change about halfway through that we both almost, but did not in fact, hit, at which point the song sounded mostly like giggles from there on out.  I like to think it was cute, but that's cause if it wasn't cute it was probably ridiculously obnoxious.  BUT FUN.

Sunday morning Sophia and Emily whipped up an amazing breakfast spread before we got back on the road with Tina filling our car with laughter.  And then, before I knew it, it was back to work again with me pretending to not be sleep deprived from all the hubbub.

fall back

This year is the first year that the fall time change has hit me so starkly.  It's like a blanket at the end of my day.  Maybe it's because I have daily routine now.  And that routine for me means early dark and evening dark.  I don't even remember how I've not noticed this so much before.  It is SO DARK, before I even leave the office.  Honestly the first day back after the time change I almost didn't know my way home because I had never driven in Buxton without sunlight.  It was bizarre.  Even this exact moment, I feel like I am staying up past my bedtime and it's only 6:30.

It's gonna be a looong winter I think.  Although, knock on everything, but Maine has been holding steady thus far in the weather department.  We had just a few sprinkles of snow and a day or two of pretty chilly, but for the most part it's been nicely bundled weather. Which, given that it happens to be almost thanksgiving, isn't too bad all things considered.

This weekend I am taking JP on his very first trip to NYC.  I'm really excited! Joe and Em and Emma are coming too, which is especially nice because they know a lot more about the workings of the city than I do. We've got museum plans, park plans, arepa plans, and sightseeing plans.  I'm excited to leave Portland for a few days, it's always nice to be somewhere different, and nice to come back to the comforts of home after adventuring.  Should be good!

Now here's a Buxton sunrise for you to enjoy:

this is halloween, halloween, halloween

Ok, before I back date and rewind through my life the past few months, I was going to get in one sneak peak Halloween post, but I was late to the game on that front too!  As you may know, Halloween is one of my favorite holidays.  I absolutely love making costumes.  I realize that it’s time consuming, and doesn’t really serve much purpose other than the sheer delight of it all, but sometimes that is exactly enough to make it worthwhile.  Luckily, I have discovered that a few of my friends here share this same costume love as well.  So naturally we had a big crafting day two weekends ago.

Liz, Julie, and Patrick came over and we busted out the sewing machine and paper goods to make a glorious mess.  Although the men folk lost interest about ten minutes in, and slunk out back to play video games,  Julie and I stayed to the bitter end stopping only once we realized that the sun had gone down and we needed to put food in our bodies.

Ok, this all leads me to the point of this all, which was supposed to be a sneak peak of my costume this year, but since I am clearly late to that party, I shall just show you the makings of and the final product.  Next year you can guess!

Our spectacular finished products in action: Pineapple and Christmas Tree, Medusa and Poseidon, and The Ocean!

And now, an extra special bonus section for all you baby loving fools out there.  Can you even handle these two adorable little ones?!! I can't.

Way too adorable.  And that was basically our Halloween in a nutshell!

apparently I died for awhile

Not like in a coma, obviously, but in a vortex of chaos combined workpatientsplanningweddingthrowinghoneymoonhaving mass effect chaos.  BUT, I am on the other side.  The blissfully amazing, clear minded side of things where I sometimes can't fall asleep because I am thinking of all the crafting I can catch up on now, and all the books I can leisurely read on the couch wrapped in blankets and puppies.  I spent a whole weekend doing ANYTHING I WANTED.  Which is amazing.  I was thinking, hey, it's been like 2 1/2 years since I have turned my brain off from near constant stress, look at me!!! But then I was looking back at some blog posts and I realized, dear lord it has been much longer then 2 1/2 years.  Pre reqs? O Chem? GRE? Applications and interviews and moving?  It has been a miiiinute.

So, I apologize for all you faithful readers out there who I am sure have been hanging on the edge of your proverbial seats.  This has been my longest hiatus yet from bloglandia. I have got quite a lot to catch you up on, and though I am tempted to back date so that in the future everything lines up nicely.....well actually, writing that sentence out loud really appealed to my overly matured sense of order so I probably will do just that.  Keep your eye out, I shall be back soon.

dwindling

Well folks, my time of endless vacation and relaxation is rapidly coming to a close.  It's been unbelievably wonderful to have this time off, and as was expected, it went by far too fast.  In general I am not very good at relaxing, or not having a schedule to keep to, but these past six weeks have been different.

I'm learning to appreciate the expanse of a day stretching before you with no responsibilities.  I've been pushing myself to explore more, and do more of the things that I have missed in the past two years.  I've been on my bike every day, which is one of my favorite places to be.  I've taken myself on solo picnics to the prom, the cemetery, the beach(es)!  I've been connecting with friends both old and new, and almost none of our conversations related to medicine, or exams, or studying. I've caught up on mindless guilty pleasure television shows, listened to all the podcasts that I've missed, and watched movies with JP late into the night.  I've read three novels and started sewing again.  I thrifted, and wined, made homemade ice cream, and played both pool and ping pong.  We camped and grilled, boated and swam.  I've been realizing more and more just how much I love this beautiful city, and just how fortunate I am to have been brought right here.

And so, tomorrow morning I start on a brand new journey.  It's a daunting one, one that I have been dreaming of and preparing for and sharing about for a very long time.  A big part of me is scared (and pessimistic, and doubtful, and feeling small), but another big part of me is excited. I know I will stumble a lot, and I know it will be difficult, but I think I am finally ready for the next step.  It's sure gonna be a big one!

oh baby girl!

Almost impossible for me to wrap my brain around, but my extraordinarily strong, smart, talented, amazing best friend brought a most beautiful life into this world this past weekend!!  I hovered by the phone trying not to text or call too much while she labored for over 40 hours!  See what I mean about extraordinarily strong?!  I am so proud of her, and so excited for their new little family!

I've left explicit instructions with your parents to not let you grow too much in the next month.  I can't wait to meet you Layla Grace!

moving day!

In my real life, I always forget the parts of moving that I don't enjoy.  Given enough time since my last move, I can just repress all those memories of muscle aches, and heavy boxes, and unwieldy objects stuck in awkward twisty staircases.

I always think about how much I just love moving!  I love the excitement of change, the new possibilities, the fresh start.  I love the unpacking and reorganizing, all the newness of everything!

Not so much the grunt work, the heat, and worst of all the dreaded cleaning.  Blech. I probably write the same blog post every time I move, so I shall spare you the details.  You all know exactly what sucks and elevates during moving!

I will say though, that we have sworn off third floor apartments in buildings that don't have an elevator.  I literally lost five pounds over the weekend we moved, which I attribute solely to the ridiculous amount of stairs I climbed.

We are settling nicely into our first floor digs, especially the pups who now have full access to viewing the outside world at dog-head heights, and our legs are thanking us silently every day.

Here's a couple more shots of our new place, we've got plenty of room for visitors! 

And a bonus sneak peek at some wedding bunting I've been busy sewing!